Random Thoughts - July 2025

Ted Reads Random Thoughts July 2025

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I am always taken a little aback; unexpectedly caught by surprise, when I see a sign on the door of a toilet, in a restaurant for example, which says “Gentlemen.”  That’s not how I see myself and am (for real) for a moment wondering if there is another one for just “Men,” or “Guys.” 

The word “Gentlemen” brings up images of a guy - dressed in fancy clothes, Italian shoes and a nice watch.   (I was once told that if I ever wanted to be respected by the movers and shakers and get ahead, I needed to wear a watch that cost at least $10,000 - FYI I wear a $39.00 Timex).  Gentlemen in my mind are those exuding suave and debonair energy, in a fancy expensive restaurant or country club, which definitely is not how I see myself.  My very favorite signage is found in Talley’s restaurant in Rapid City, South Dakota. There are two toilets, both are identified by a WHATEVER sign. It never fails to bring a grin to my face. How relieving. It takes all the anxiety away about walking into the wrong one and diffuses the current hysteria and arguments that have been politicized so vehemently about gender.

“Can I have a good number for you? The hospital attendant asks. “Could I have a good name?” the counter order-taker asks after I tell him what kind of sandwich I’d like. I understand what they are asking and why but is there such a thing as a bad number or a bad name? I tested that out with the sandwich guy, and said, “What would happen if I gave you a bad one.”  He didn’t get the joke, and said, “What?”  I repeated my question, he got my bad attempt at humor this time, and said “Sure, as long as you recognize it.”   

I had an unexpected excursion into another realm last fall, and one thing was certain. Everything is in constant motion, ever-changing, never the same from one moment to the next, this moment is gone and another arriving. I’d save myself a lot of grief and increase my pleasure experiences if I could remember that. “Live each day as your last” I’ve heard. “Live each day as your first,” I like better.

I was talking with a friend and realized that there is a difference between being enmeshed in a system and engaged with one. We were talking about families. One of them feels a lot better than the other.

I heard a commentator say of a coach, “He was a good player in his own right.”  What’s with that comment? How about just saying, “He was also a great player?”

Sometimes I am comforted by learning of other’s follies. I now live in Colorado. 50+ years ago someone had the bright idea of using a nuclear explosive device to get at natural gas reserves. It worked; the gas was released.

Unfortunately, they discovered that it couldn’t be used because of the radiation of the newly released resource created by the explosive device. I’ve done some dumb things, but not on that scale. Maybe I would have if I had the opportunity, and maybe that’s why nature in her wisdom has not allowed me to do things of such magnitude. It feels satisfying somehow to know that someone else has done something dumber than I have.

I have been challenged by some of my readers about the content of my writing lately. It seems that for them, too much of what I write these days falls into the political realm, and that is disappointing to them. Especially if they see what I see differently.

It seems they used to enjoy reading what I had to say, but these days, not so much. I appreciate their being honest with me. A sign of a good friend.

I have decided to respect their perspective in the sense that I will divide my blog into two parts. Political and Non-Political. I have learned that such preferences actually have a brain function basis.

I will warn folks when I am about to go ‘Political” so that they don’t have to be victimized by my political meanderings.

THE FOLLOWING IS POLITICAL CONTENT, IF YOU DON’T WANT TO BE EXPOSED TO IT, STOP READING NOW.

When I am gently, or not so gently, nudged about my behavior, I tend to self-reflect.

Why do I write about the stuff I am writing about? Why so much more political stuff now?

Here is what I have come up with.

I have been homeless, I have been without enough to eat, I have had nothing but rags to wear. I have been dirty. I have been without the most basic medical care. I have been targeted, mocked, made fun of, physically beaten and ridiculed for all the above by those better off than me. By people in control of me. The details of my experience are unbelievable and would gross you out I promise.

None of it was because of everyone in my family not working, or laziness. It wasn’t because anyone was evil. It was about how people who had lots (the privileged) interfaced with those of us who lived in poverty.

I experienced all the above before the age of 15. During all of that time, not one person who could have changed things did. No one said anything. No one even acknowledged what was happening, except, maybe indirectly by looking at me disgustingly, some acting out as detailed above. Even as a kid I wondered why. I kept looking for someone who might see what was going on and at least say something. Maybe even do something to help. Never happened.

I vowed then, as a little kid, that if I ever had the chance to speak up when I saw or experienced other people in a similar state I would. If I had the chance to help, I would. And starting as a young adult, I did and still do. It is scary and if one does that, they will pay a penalty.

Why am I speaking up more these days? I am now a citizen of a country that is calculatingly, at the highest levels of government, with the consent of the masses (some of my friends included) doing to the powerless the very same kinds of things that I experienced, to the people of our country. Maybe not directly, but by proxy.

That’s it.

That’s why I write what I am writing. Pointing a finger at the perpetrators. Fulfilling the promise I made to myself 70 years ago, to speak up on behalf of those who have no voice.

Believe me, there are days I wish I couldn’t see what is happening, but I can’t. A blessing or a curse? Obliviousness has its advantages and disadvantages. Awareness its costs.

Do I have any real hope that it will change anything for those people victimized? No. Unless knowing someone like me, who sees what is happening to them, and though I can’t do anything about it, at least I can speak up, at least I can say, even if it’s only with my eyes, say “I’m sorry, it shouldn’t be happening to you, it is wrong and immoral.”

Am I being totally selfish? Probably. I got into a good bit of trouble one time in college in my “Ethics” class by suggesting that I believed there was a selfish component in every altruistic act. If I were in that class today, I’d still be in trouble.

I’d like to hear from my Republican friend who told me there was nothing to worry about when I expressed concern way back when about Medicare being cut for poor people. He somewhat mockingly said, “It will never happen.” “Number one, he promised he would keep it from happening, and number two, America’s “Balance of Power” would never allow it to happen if the powers that be, tried.”  Oops.

There are those who suggest that the only people who have lost/will lose SNAP and/or Medicaid benefits are those who shouldn’t be receiving/don’t deserve them in the first place, because they are not citizens. That the system is riddled with fraud.

I’d like someone to explain to me then, how that squares with some of my Lakota (Native American) friends, who were ‘citizens’ of North America long before there was an America, being on the receiving end of those cuts.

If you’d be inclined to suggest “that’s not happening,” I would be very willing to set up a phone call or two (or three, or…...) to give you an opportunity hear directly from the people I personally know, who are on the receiving end of such cuts.

Maybe change the narrative from “all” to “some are not citizens,” perhaps? I know that “some” doesn’t quite have the same punch as “all.”  Saying “some” sort of waters down the self-righteous energy though.

Fraud? By far most of the fraud that occurs is by the providers, not the recipients.

I was saddened to see that Harvard folded. If you understand how the Nazi’s normalized what they did and what they were doing, that had the effect of hypnotizing an entire population, you will see the similarities.

“If you make this one little concession, we will leave you alone, and we will be able to keep you and your people safe.”  Each week, or month, they come back and ask for “just one more concession.”

That tool worked to mesmerize the entire citizenry of Germany, including remarkable numbers of Jewish leaders. The old “frog in the water as it gradually heats up to boiling temperature” trick. I understand, it was really a “Sophie’s Choice” moment for Harvard. We seem much too far down the road for it to be an actual choice. “Want to give me your wallet or have me kill your kid? Your choice.”

I’d like to know from the supporters of this regime how they believe that discrediting and defunding science, rewriting history so it reflects a happier story, gutting and censoring education, suppressing the press and media, attacking the arts, using terror and intimidation and scapegoating the powerless will make for a better country to live in.

I typically like the flash, bang, pageantry, and ‘good’ feelings that the 4^th of July brings. I don’t ever remember not enjoying this holiday. It seemed to me that it ‘brought out the best’ in people.

I found it unexpectedly difficult for me to celebrate the most recent one, when the theme being celebrated (Independence and Freedom) has been taken away for so many, in so many ways, in such a short period of time, with seemingly so little recognition or caring by so many, with such an aura of self-righteousness, and hubris.  I am not just talking about citizenship. I am talking about freedom for medical care, food, voting, right to choose what I want to do with my own body (get a COVID vaccination for example) etc.

The entire day felt as if I was watching the Titanic sinking and being asked to focus on the orchestra. Or being a member of a highly dysfunctional family sitting through a “Happy Family” multi-day convention. Or being expected to celebrate the Super Bowl as my best friend died in my arms earlier that day. I mostly felt and feel sad.

My delusions of what it means to be an American has been blown apart like a firework display’s grand finale. I heard myself say to a friend, “What, exactly are we celebrating, and who is the “we” who are celebrating?”